Driving Jitters

I should’ve made this blog before. I had no time since I was still studying then. The last semester I was enrolled in ended just this March. I’ve been a bum for a month and a half already. I should’ve posted these things before.. So anyways, I’m currently living far from home, here with male best friend. I have lots of best friends. Ya know.. So anyway, I’m currently looking for a job, I’m gonna stop school for a while, my mom told me she didn’t have enough money for my studies. I was like, okay.. I’m sad.. If I just did what I had to do, and not waste all the tuition fees away, I should’ve already graduated. I enjoyed the college life so much that I found out that it’s already 5 years! My family used to have money for everything we need. 3 years ago.. When the family business started to sell low, we also started to embrace the so-called poverty. With debts all over. My dad had to go back abroad after 15 years to be an employee again. His job there? A steel fixer. Whatever it is, I may never know. My theory says it’s like a being construction worker (in the steels area though), my dad never tells me what his job is like. He’s been away for a year now, and his contract will expire in two years. But he’ll be home by this June… He called my mom told her that he puked blood! I was scared; I wanted him to go home. I’m in the medical field so I know what puking blood means.

At the same time, I have this evil feeling that he shouldn’t go home yet. You see, when he left the country, he also left me the keys to the family vehicle. An L300 type of crap. But it’s cool, I’m driving it right now. I learned driving it in a week! Though I crashed a couple of times. My mom will be very upset as soon as she sees the wounds of my baby when I bring the car home. Anyway, my friends were amazed with my driving. We went to different places. I still got no license, but I’m brave enough! The first time I drove the highway without any professional with me was the scariest moment of the 1 week history of my driving. There were couple of freaking scenes in just a day:

Scene #1: I can’t get through the intersection. – Mr. Traffic Enforcer invited me to pull over.
Scene #2: I crashed with a sitting guy. – He slammed onto my vehicle’s side. Ooh, that’s gotta hurt!
Scene #3: I made that other vehicle spin. – I monstered the other lane and the poor driver tried all his efforts not crash with me, then he turned circles!
Scene #4: My lights are off. – I didn’t know that my lights are off until I nearly ran over a walking ugly guy.
Scene #5: One way. – I entered a one-way street. Period.
Scene #6: I can’t go home. - After all of the accidents, I was too shaky to drive home.

Anyway, I hope my dad will be fine. I hope his condition is not that serious. He’s 49, and still working his bones out. I might be selfish to think this way, that he won’t go home yet until I’m finished with my so called “car flaunting”. But what can I do? It feels good when people around me I know see me driving. I miss my dad but I’m still not done with my social climbing yet…